There is something about company social events that I find immensely depressing, emotionally.

 

My current client organised a New Year’s bash yesterday evening. It was very high quality; very well prepared food (none of the typical British “we can’t cook properly because there’s lots of people” nonsense) with unlimited wine, in a beautiful building in the centre of town, served by a dozen immaculate waiters. Someone clearly put a lot of effort into getting the event right, and someone did a very good job too.

 

But I left the event early, feeling depressed. This isn’t unusual: whatever the company, whatever the quality, I tend to leave company social events feeling depressed.

 

The unlimited alcohol might be part of it, but I’m not convinced. I have been known to over-indulge at other times, usually involving certain pubs in England, and I don’t associate being drunk with feeling down. I realise there’s a chemical connection there; alcohol is a downer, and that no doubt exaggerates my experience. But it’s not the cause; I can stay sober and still feel the depression.

 

It might be because my professional colleagues are not the people I would chose to socialise with, even though, here, most of them are highly intelligent and some have a practitioners’ interest in the serious arts. That’s not a sleight on them, it’s merely that I want to get away from work when I socialise. But that’s a reason to avoid the events, or to leave early, that’s not a reason to feel down.

 

Part of it is because I don’t like mass social events anyway, except for concerts, plays, performances and the like. Socially, I feel most comfortable in a reasonable size room, reasonably full. Mind you, that might simply be the consequence of decades of enjoying British pubs.

 

Something makes me down, and I’ve never put my finger on it. Mind you, I’ve soon cheered up; on Monday I’m starting a Flemish language course. I’ll be meeting a good number of new people who’ll share my interest in pickup up some Dutch.